Whose report will you believe?

The other day I watched an evening news programme interview various Russian public regarding their views on the 'spy poisoning' incident which has recently occured in Britain. One young woman was at a loss to answer who she thought was telling the truth. She confessed that she could trust no one. 'Well how do you know what to believe?' was the final question, to which she sadly shrugged her shoulders and admitted that she could trust no one.

How sad.

This is the dilemma we face. Depending on who is doing the reporting, many of us find we could agree with both sides simultaneously - there is so much spin and cover up.

The rise of social media has not helped  - each of us has learned to create our own realities, ones which we are happy to live with.  We have become experts at being spin doctors in our own worlds, happily creating  our own reality from which we attempt to navigate life.

But..... what is true and who do we believe and which story is the most credible?

The art of debating has dwindled - Oxford University recently berated the fact that this generation do not appear to know how to be open minded to alternative views and intolerant of reasoned discussion.
Some universities are now making the ability to debate a requirement of student admission!

Which brings me to the reason I began this blog. I am becoming more of the opinion that we need some clear moral guidelines and boundaries to help frame our world view to help us navigate the world of spin and lies and exploitation.

There's nothing new under the sun and without a clear framework to life in these days of fake news and social media 'reality', the only outcome for a generation devoid of this, is mental health issues and suicide.

There....I said it!
I dared to challenge the 'elephant' in the room concerning mental health.
In my view it's linked with a lack of clear boundaries to do with thinking and 'being' in a world which is at best confused and at worst set to become destroyed by power hungry, manipulative and evil beings.

I find my own peace of mind in the midst of a world in turmoil coming from the wisdom found within the ancient book...there is nothing new under the sun. We fool and oursleves to think we're special and 'enlightened'  and would be best humbling ourselves under the hand of God.

My own mental health is kept stable through my belief that God has made a way through Jesus that will lead us all into an eternal destiny that far surpasses anyone or anything that the physical world has to offer. Jesus has shown us how to live in a way that is fully alive. There is a better and higher Kingdom and rule than the rulers of this world have to offer.

That's worth living for. That's worth standing for. That's worth shouting from the rooftops....there IS a truth that stands that you CAN trust and will give you peace of mind and assurance for the future.

May God bless you and lead you into all truth in the days ahead.

Maggots and Mothers

I was given much food for thought last weekend as I listened to friends of ours field phone calls and messages regarding their youngest son who is now at university. Both parents had become personally involved in 'dialogue' with the university regarding an absence the son had taken due to illness. They were fully hands on, arranging that the hospital doctors send letters to the appropriate people in order to ensure their son did not miss out on one of the exams he had missed.

I began to wonder if my husband and I had failed our daughter who at A level results stage nearly 2 years ago, had experienced a blow that would have had my friends writing to the local, if not national newspapers in order to get justice for their son. 

I can see it now - 'Maggots cause A level fails in local school.'

I didn't respond in the above way for all sorts of reasons but as time has passed I sincerely regret that decision and wish I had stood up for my daughter by at least contacting the school. It was all because they had used live MAGGOTS in the practical part of her A level Human Biology exam!

I was never a pushy parent. Not the sort that likes to join the PTA, smooze with the head teacher and generally make themselves known for personal gain.

Our daughter was great at science and it was a 'science' school. We watched her blossom academically to the point where she was predicted an A in 'A' level Human Biology. Happy Days.

The day the results came out I watched what should have been an ecstatic moment turn into a damp squib. I don't think she or I fully registered what had gone wrong. The practical part of the exam for which she had high hopes of a good grade, was a FAIL! Resulting in a C grade.

She was devastated but over the next few weeks held it together well as she was informed by the school they were going to question the examiners decisions. For a whole school to FAIL this part of the exam because they had used live MAGGOTS in their practical experiment was not acceptable.

The irony of ironies is that my daughter had HATED the maggots - they made her feel phyiscally sick.  I went online to look at photo's of them to put at the head of this blog but felt horrified at the images that appeared. During her practical she'd had to put one in her mouth to warm it up! She said that they were the most pampered and well looked after maggots ever. She told me that they were fortunate maggots as they were alive by the end of it. Should they have ended up being purchased by a fisherman they would have been 'gonners'.  

I sat back and let my daughter do the running. She was 18 I reasoned. I guess the school were no longer 'obliged' to write to us as parents and let us know the error that had occured. Even as I write this I realise how crazy that sounds as a justification for not making more of a fuss over what happened. Having had a relationship with the school for 10 years with constant communication, invitations to awards etc, why should the school think we were no longer interested?

My daughter tells me the school appealed and were told the decision was final, all the pupils had failed this part of the exam and there was no further way of appeal. The tragedy is that this was the last time this particular exam was being taken. There was no way my daughter could even resit!

Maybe going to the local papers would have helped?

I regret that I didn't!

Sadly this blog is too little too late. 

To our daughter - 

We're SO SORRY! You will always be our daughter and from now on we'll always try to stick up for you, fight with you and stand by you. We love you and are proud of you, that despite set backs and the education system letting you down at the last hurdle, we know you'll go far. 

Writing THE book!

Some years ago, as I shared yet another story from my travel experiences, a friend turned to me,  looked me straight in the eye and said  'you should write a book'. He wasn't the first friend to have told me this.  As usual I dismissed it out of hand due to the fact that I considered myself to be the last person on earth who should write a book and that it seemed like every other Tom, Dick and Harriet were in the writing business. 

Since blogging however, I have managed to recount several stories over the years and I began to wonder how many stories I could find that might be worth the telling. I began collating them about 5 years ago and towards the end of last year had a collection of 21.

I wondered if this might be enough to make up a book and began to read and research everything to do with book publishing. One of the first questions I had to ask myself was to do with the audience. Who was I actually writing for? It was then that it occured to me. My purpose in sharing stories was to help people who might be facing the sorts of things I have had to face in life. From infertility and miscarriage through to cancer, I knew that sharing some of my journey might encourage and help others. Who better to share my story with than my own daughter who per chance happened to be coming up to her 21st birthday. If I could leave some words of wisdom, advice and encouragement for her then I would happily feel the book had been worthwhile. 

I therefore self published the book for her 21st birthday. It was a one off copy with the 21 stories and smatterings of various photo's and pieces of art work I have done over the years that have helped me process life's journey.

I called it '21 love mum'.

I had thought this might have been the full sum of my literary genius and was happy with completion. It wasn't perfect, I didn't imagine it would ever be a best seller but it was a piece of me left for posterity.

Until......... I began to ponder the possiblity of a wider audience. I started to revisit and play with the manuscript and developed some thinking around it being a devotional sort of book. Each story being a stand alone piece that could provoke further thought and consideration from the reader. I was more selective in my choice of art work, choosing pieces that I felt would enhance the stories and communicate beyond the limitation of the written word. Much of the art work ended up consisting of mosaics I have made to mark various seasons of life.

This time I was brave enough to employ an editor who then went on to do a remarkable job of helping shape the book towards the excellence I so often give up on and I pressed on through.

The book is written, the devotional additions and pictures are almost in place and I am now in the serious position of needing to publish. 

Only a few more decisions to be made, a book cover to be finalised and I will have in my hands a book that, like a restrained dove, can finally be set loose in the world.

Carphone Warehouse - dispassionate ageism?

Those who know me realise I'm not one to rant. Today is the exception to the rule through my dealings with Carphone Warehouse and the dispassionate response in trying to sort out my aged mother in-laws phone.

She has recently come to live with us and is in the process of selling the family home in Dorset. She has been the main carer for my father in-law who has Parkinsons and related dementia.  The final straw in caring for him came a few weeks ago when she became ill enough to warrant hospital admission.

With her daughter in Australia and also needing to keep in contact with the precious few friends she would be leaving behind, we thought it would be a lovely idea for her 88th birthday last Friday to buy her an iPhone 6. With the large touch screen we figured she would soon get the hang of it. She's been fairly tech savvy so far with her computer.

We tried to order the phone online through Carphone Warehouse but the payment was declined, we were told to ring them directly. In the phone conversation I had on ordering, I was assured that there wouldn't be a problem with changing the new phone number to her old number. With my mind at rest we ordered the phone which happily arrived on the day of her birthday.

I did everything I was told to do - I set up the new phone with the EE sim card and then rang them to get the number changed. I was a little suspicious of the man who answered my call in that he seemed to be having a problem. He put me on hold and eventually someone else came online and told me that it would take 48 hours.

48 hours later and no sign of the change over I ended up having to ring EE again to see what the problem was. Again I was concerned because my mother in-law had gone ahead and posted 90 letters with change of address and contact details using the old phone number. One friend had tried to ring the old number only to have it answered by an Indian man who insisted it was his phone number!

'Angela' the EE phone agent I got through to was very helpful. She told me that there was no record of any call on Friday but that she would sanction it again. She assured me that in 48 hours we would get a text confirming the change over to the old number. We waited patiently……

Today a text came from EE saying there was a problem and that we should ring them.

I duly rang and spoke to 'Andrew'. By this time I was not in a frame of mind to be fobbed off any more and made my feelings known. He was apologetic and said that he would sanction and that it would be done in 48 hours! I expressed the view that EE had not reassured us of the customer service they boast of on the marketing splurge. I was seriously considering pulling out of the contract which the Carphone Warehouse agent had assured me I could do within 14 days. With all the 48 hours hours we were being given to wait, the time frame was shrinking rapidly. He told me that he would go to the next level to get this prioritised, he would get back to me.

Meanwhile I decided I would ring Carphone Warehouse to make sure we would be within the 14 days of pulling out of contract and to fill them in the picture. I spoke to 'Zukira', patiently explaining the story so far. When I mentioned that we might possibly want to pull out of the  contract she became more officious and patronising. She said she wasn't able to deal with me directly. I explained my mother in law was 88 and I was dealing with the call to prevent further stress to her but that I could get my mother in law to answer security questions. What followed was frankly outrageous. Zukira had obviously decided that the party line was to insist we visit a Carphone Warehouse. Even though my mother in law satisfied all the security questions that Zukira asked  - Zukira insisted that she had not answered them sufficiently. We both asked her what it was we hadn't answered sufficiently. Zukira was wanting to get off the call, I insisted that my mother in law would be able to satisfy all security questions. Even down to the payment card and number used to purchase the phone, which by the way she hadn't requested.

Zukira was not listening. She was repeating that we needed to go to a Carphone Warehouse shop. Even when I pleaded for some compassion and understanding of the situation, that she was an old lady and unable to leave the house. At this point Zukira continued to insist she'd asked all the security questions, I challenged her about lying, that there must be some other security questions. At this point she put down the phone……..

Seems EE might pull out the stops and resolve the number problem in the next 5- 24 hours. We'll wait and see. I certainly hope so!  I don't fancy dealing with Carphone Warehouse ever again let alone the nightmare scenario of taking my 88 year old mother in-law into one of their shops to try and cancel the contract! If Zukira is representative of the indifference they show towards their customers, especially the elderly and house bound, then be warned dear reader!

Retreat with Jesus: Day 40

So 40 days ago when I looked forward at today's date I was excited to see it coincides with a major 'happening' in my life. I'm also delighted to discover it's pancake Tuesday! 

So the big event? Bri and I going away. We leave in about 10 minutes to get the coach to Heathrow and then onto Thailand where Bri is speaking at a conference and I have the blessing of tagging along! The conference is considering a 'World without orphans'.

The reading today is from Revelation 21 and verse 4 stands out for me as we go on our journey. One day we can be assured that this will happen.

"And God shall wipe away every tear from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: of the former things are passed away."

For the moment, we do our part in partnering with Holy Spirit to see God's Kingdom and His will be done on earth as it is in heaven.
As we start another 40 days towards Easter maybe I'll post some more ponderings. For now….it's been fun having you along! God Bless you in the next 40!

Retreat with Jesus: Day Thirty-nine

Penultimate day of the 40 day retreat and I find it hard to believe I got this far with the 'plogs'. If you've tracked with me through them all then THANK YOU - it's been such an encouragement:-)

The readings continue to challenge - I read todays in 'The Passion' translation. The cost of following Jesus is truly high if we should appear to hate our father, mother, wife, sister, brothers…even our own lives in comparison. Jesus wasn't into gathering huge numbers of followers - if he was he would have made following him much easier. If anything he discouraged the massive crowds of people by saying that they should count the cost. The illustrations He gave hint at our need for total dependency on Him regardless of the cost.

Retreat with Jesus: Day Thirty-eight

There is much in this passage that reassures us that we do not need to be anxious about ANYTHING. Jesus gives us loads of examples to consider in light of God's creation that we are of more significance than some very valid, beautiful and precious things. A verse I was given at my baptism many years ago is ' Seek first the Kingdom and His righteousness and all these things shall be added unto you.' As we keep the main thing the main thing, life is put in perspective, worry and anxiety is obliterated, and we are released to live in true freedom.